LET'S SPEAK ENGLISH:
Broadcast: Monday, June 19, 1939 at 9:00 PM

Third Talk of New Series -Vocabulary

I. Proper use of words with similar meanlngs:
a) Aged, Old and Elderly
b) Ancient and Antique
c) Antiquated, Old-fashioned and Obsolete.

II. Plurals:
a) Ox - Oxen
b) Information - Information
c) Crisis - Crises.

III Difference between almost similar words :
a) Diplomatic and Diploma
b) Certify and Certificate
c) Salon and Saloon.

IV. Words seldom used in Palestlnee:
a) Obedience
b) Merit.

TRANSCRIPT: THIRD TALK - VOCABULARY

The trouble is that English is a rich language. There are dozens of words for almost everything and it's difficult to know which one to use. Each word has a slightly different meaning; and if you're not very careful, you'll get hold of the wrong one, and say something you never meant.

For example, if my grandmother's over ninety and near the end of her life, I can say she's AGED: not merely old or elderly, but aged.

But my uncle is only seventy. He's merely reached a ripe age and has no thought of dying. He's not aged but only OLD. If he sees a pretty girl, he says, "Ah! If I were only sixty!" So if I call him aged instead of old, he'll probably cross me right out of his will.

Now my cousin, on the other hand, is not seventy but only fifty. He's just reached the age when the waist begins to increase and the hair begins to decrease. If I call him aged, he'll have a fit: if I call him old he'll knock me down. He's merely ELDERLY.

What a problem, isn't it ? Thank God, I'm still a baby of forty! Now there are other words implying age, such as ANCIENT and ANTIQUE. Ancient is the opposite of modern. You can talk about an ancient belief; something that was once believed but is now quite out of date. You can't call it an elderly belief or even an aged belief: those words are used only for persons. It's an ancient belief.

Insects sometimes lay their eggs in dead animals, so three hundred years ago, people believed that insects could be made out of dead animals: wasps out of dead horses; bees from dead mules and beetles from dead donkeys. No-one believes that any more: it's just an ancient belief.

Now ANTIQUE is something that's long been ancient but of which specimens still exist. We talk of an antique statue, meaning a statue of the Greek or Roman civilization which has now largely disappeared. Palestine is full of antiques - antique pottery, antique coins and, I'm ashamed to say, even antique Government officials.

But if a thing is out of date, like a law, we usually say it's ANTIQUATED. The system of leasing houses in Jerusalem each year from Muharram is antiquated. It's bad enough to have to move from one house to another: but when everyone has to do it at the same time, it's intolerable. At Muharram the streets of Jerusalem are so jammed full of porters with grand pianos and Biedermeyer furniture on their backs that you can hardly find room to walk.

Do you know the story of the man who was moving house in Jerusalem and decided to do it himself? He took a cupboard, staggered down stairs with it into the street and up stairs into his new flat. Then he brought down a treasured possession, one of those tall grand-father clocks, clasped to his bosom. On the way someone tapped him on the shoulder and said, "Excuse me ! Why don't you wear a wrist-watch, like other people ? "

If someone follows customs that are out of date, you call him OLD-FASHIONED. I'm very old-fashioned. I still carry an old-fashioned watch and chain. I can't use a typewriter and never dictate a letter. I wear old-fashioned clothes and I like old-fashioned books. I can't dance the Lambeth Walk: I don't know how to fly an aeroplane: I'm just old-fashioned.

In fact, I'm so old-fashioned that I'm nearly OBSOLETE. A thing's obsolete when it's no longer used. The big sailing ship is now obsolete: so are many words that were in use until quite recently. It's curious how quickly certain words become obsolete in Palestine, even today. When immigrants arrive, all they can say in Hebrew is 'please', 'thank you' and 'how do you do?' After they've been here a year, they've picked up several hundred other Hebrew words. But they've forgotten how to use 'please', 'thank you' and 'how do you do?'

Let's now examine a few English plurals. It's hard to get some of those right. They're like your teeth - often irregular.

The regular plural is made, of course, by adding an s at the end. One lawyer - several lawyers. But let's be original and keep to one lawyer.

Sometimes the plural is made by adding E-S at the end instead of S. E-S is added after certain letters such as s to make the plural easier to pronounce. You have one curfew pass or, if you're clever, several curfew passes. In Palestine today, you need dozens of passes, cards, permits and licenses - identity cards, travel permits, car licenses, drivers' licenses, revolver licenses, wireless licenses and dog licenses. You can't do anything in Palestine nowadays without a license. If you want to wear a hat you need a hat license. If you want a cup of coffee you need a coffee license. If you want a baby, you need.... a perambulator. It's just terrible.

Now the English word ox has an irregular plural - OXEN, not oxes and not even oxygen. An ox is a very strong animal, a symbol of strength. I once received an application from a young man who was trying to get a job. He wanted to show he was strong, so he said, "Bodily I am so healthy as to be able to box oxen". I just needed a brave chap like that, so he got the job. An ox is a bull that's made to pull a plough or a wagon. Cows, being ladies, are exempted from this duty, which is very unfair on the bulls. In the Samoan Islands, in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, the natives have no native word for bull or cow. These animals were brought to the islands quite recently by missionaries. Rather, one bull and one cow were brought at first. The natives asked what they were called. The missionary said, 'A bull and a cow', so the natives called each one a 'bullemacow' . To distinguish between them, they called the male a ' bullemacow Johnny' and the female a 'bullemacow Mary' . When some calves were born, they called the male calf a 'piccaninny bullemacow Johnny' and the female calf a 'piccaninny bullemacow Mary' . Nice and easy the Samoan language, isn't it?

Another irregular plural in English is INFORMATION. The plural is the same as the singular - 'information'. You can't say 'informations'. If you do you're a Ping. All Pings ask, 'what are the latest informations?. They should ask, 'what is the latest information?'

One of the brightest members of the Brighter English League has told me of a notice in a Haifa hotel which says, 'Information at the porter'. Of course, that should. be 'Information from the porter'. If you say 'at the porter', you mean you throw something at him. Perhaps; the hotel manager got so tired of all the people who told him how to run his hotel that he asked them to throw the information at the porter.

CRISIS has an irregular plural. You don't leave the word unchanged and say 'several crisis'. Nor do you say 'several crisises'. You say 'several CRISES' - with an E-S at the end. In fact, you say nothing else these days. That's why you listen in to the news on your wireless half a dozen times a day instead of waiting for a newspaper the next morning as I do. You just want to get the bad news first.

Most of the news nowadays is about foreign affairs. Much of it is about international relations. This ambassador sees that foreign minister and, although they have a violent row in private, the wireless announces as a matter of course that their views were found to be in complete harmony. That's, diplomacy: and the men who do that kind of thing are diplomatic.

Now you musn't confuse DIPLOMATIC with DIPLOMAED. Diplomaed means someone who has a diploma: someone who has received a document from an institution showing that he's proficient in some branch of knowledge. Diplomas. are given to doctors, to dentists and to midwives to show that they are qualified to practice their art. There used to be a notice outside a flat in Jerusalem which said 'Diplomatic midwife'. It should have been 'Diplomaed midwife'. Unless, of course, it meant that she knew how to keep her mouth shut.

There's the same confusion in Pinglish between the use of CERTIFY and CERTIFICATE. A certificate is like a diploma: teachers are given certificates when they graduate from a training school. Then they're known as certificated teachers.

The Certificate shows that they're qualified : but it isn't correct to call them certified teachers. There used to be a signboard in Jerusalem outside a teacher's house saying 'English lessons given by certified English lady'. It was nice to know that she was certified to be a lady. It should of course have read 'English lessons given by a certificated English lady' .

Now, if you don't want to be called a Ping, you must also be careful not to confuse SALON and SALOON. 'Salon' is a French word which means a reception room in a private house. In a special sense it used to mean a gathering of notable people at the house of a fashionable lady. The salon of the countess of so-and-so. It used to imply refinement, influence, taste and wit. Now, artists and dressmakers have adopted the word for the periodic exhibitions of their creations.

But 'salon' in French can't be translated into 'saloon' in English. There are saloons on ships - big public rooms. But on land the saloon is a hall used for billiards, dancing or drink. The salon is the resort of the elegant, while the saloon is the playground of the vulgar.

So dressmakers in Haifa should not call their show-rooms 'dressmakers' saloons', as I have seen them do, or they may be invaded by thirsty sailors.

Now sailors may like a good drink but they've learnt one great quality - OBEDIENCE. But that's not a word that's used much in Palestine, except by Government officials who always have the honour to be your obedient servant.

In Palestine everyone does what he wants to, when he wants to and how he wants to, even in normal times. The result is anarchy. So the next time you have to stand at the end of a queue at the cinema, don't try to show off to your girl friend by forcing your way in at the beginning of the queue. And when the referee orders you off the football field for something you may not even have done, obey the whistle and don't hit him on the nose.

If the word 'obedience' is seldom used in Palestine, the word MERIT is used even less, especially where getting a job is concerned ..

Among the less educated, a large family is considered to be the strongest claim for appointment, not merit. I once had a letter from a man who wrote, "I am the father of fourteen children and too old and feeble to do any work. So I beg to be given a job in your Government".

Some people have very confused ideas about even the meaning of merit. To be good at one thing doesn't mean 'that you're good at everything. A young man once wanted to be a clerk in my office, so he wrote as follows: "Being the son of a famous. general contractor and well aware of all sanitary work and having great ability in removing manure, I should like to work in your office".

I'm afraid I didn't regard .that letter as a great compliment. Another young man tried to capture my interest by sheer impudence.

He cheerfully adopted me as his father and began his letter like this :

"My dear new Father, I have the honour to acknowledge your 'Director with Your New Son. As I think you don't know me, perhaps I myself don't know you. Glory be to God !"

But if you want to know how to write good letters and to choose your words properly, let me recommend an excellent book. It's called "A Manual of English for Foreign Students" by Marshall and Schaap - "A Manual of English for Foreign Students" by Marshall and Schaap (S-C-H-A-A-P), published by Hachette in London. It costs twenty seven piastres in Palestine: rather expensive, I'm afraid, but it's worth it. You can order it through any bookseller. Good night.