LET'S SPEAK ENGLISH:
Broadcast: Monday, August 14, 1939 at 9:00 PM

Eleventh Talk of New Series - Composition

I. Correct Order of Words,

II. Simplicity of Style; Use: a) Begin instead of Commence
b) Write instead of Communicate
c) Send instead of Transmit
d) Live instead of Reside
e) Try instead of Endeavour
f) Go instead of Proceed.

III. Rhythm of phrasing. Example:
"You have won by your sympathy and kindliness something warmer than allegiance and profounder than loyalty. Today you are more than Sovereign. You are head of the family, and of a nation and an empire you have made a household."

IV. Punctuation With quotations from English authors.

V. Grammatical Construction
A paragraph of Pinglish will be dictated. Listeners are invited to copy it down, rewrite it correctly and sent it to the President of the Brighter English League. Prizes are offered for the best versions received. So have a piece of paper and a pencil ready.

TRANSCRIPT: ELEVENTH TALK - COMPOSITION

Composition is the art of putting your sentences together correctly.

When practising this art there are five points to remember. The first is that you must arrange the different parts of your sentence in the right order : otherwise you may be misunderstood.

For example, if you've got a wrist-watch for sale - a square one, not a round one - be careful not to advertise it like this : - 'For sale, a square-faced gentleman's wrist-watch'. The advertisement should read 'For sale, a gentleman's square-faced wrist-watch';. Otherwise people will think it's your face that's square. I do hope it isn't.

You must also be careful if you have to write an epitaph for a tombstone. There was a man whose brother had been accidentally shot. The man wanted to show his affection for his brother by putting up a tombstone to his memory. The correct epitaph would have been 'Erected, as a mark of affection by his brother, to the memory of John Phillips, accidentally shot'. Instead, the man wrote 'Erected to the memory of John Phillips accidentally shot as a mark of affection by his brother.'

A strange kind of affection! That must be the secret of terrorism in Palestine: it's just to show how much every one loves every one else.

Lastly, there's the complaint written by an elderly couple to the manager of a boarding-house about the noise made by a new-born baby in the next room. They wrote 'We have complained of the noise ever since the baby was born at least twice every night', What they should have written, of course, was 'We have complained of the noise at least twice every night since the baby was born'.

So you see how important the correct order of words is in a sentence.

The second thing to remember is to be simple. It's no good trying to impress people by using long words. That's a special failing in Government departments where many officials try to show their colleagues and the long-suffering public what a large vocabulary they have. Those officials never begin a letter; they always commence a letter: they never write to you; they always communicate with you. They don't send you an enclosure; 'they transmit it. They don't ask where you live, but where you reside. And they never try to write simply; they always endeavour to express themselves in accordance with the procedure to be adopted for use in connexion with the correspondence with members of the public. And even if they lose their tempers, they never say 'Go to hell ! ' They say 'Kindly proceed to the infernal regions!'.

No wonder the inhabitants in one village greeted their new District Commissioner with a large sign stretched across the road saying 'Welcome to our new District Commissioner: God help our Government'. When you say that ironically - 'God help our Government!' - it means that they're almost past praying for.

The nicest attack I ever saw on this kind of verbal flatulence was in the Secretariat in Jerusalem some years ago. One of the Assistant Secretaries had to edit the agricultural chapter of the Annual Government Report to the League of Nations. There was something about the cucumber crop having been good that year. But he thought 'cucumber' was a vulgar word so he used the Latin term and changed the sentence to read 'cucurbitaceous plants did well'. But his chief was a man who disliked such pompousness and wrote in the margin 'Surely you mean cucumbersome?'

That third point I want you to remember is the importance of rhythm. Your prose sentences should be as well balanced and rhythmic as if you were trying to write verse. Don't use awkward words, especially at the end of a sentence. Each phrase should start easily, sweep down like a hanging chain and come up again to a definite close.

Here's an example of how not to write English taken from 'Arabia Deserta' by Charles Doughty who, in my private opinion, is a greatly overrated writer : -

"A new voice hailed me of an old friend when, first returned from the Peninsula, I paced again in that long street of Damascus which is called Straight; and suddenly taking me wondering by the hand, 'Tell me (said he), since thou art here again in the peace and assurance of Ullah, and whilst we walk, as in the former years, toward the new blossoming orchards, full of the sweet spring as the garden of God, what moved thee, or how couldst thou take such journeys into the fanatic Arabia?'"

That's got just about as much rhythm as a limping and decrepit camel.

But here's an example of really rhythmic English taken from a speech by the Speaker of the House of Commons addressing His Majesty King George the Fifth on his Jubilee in 1935: -

'You have won by Your sympathy and kindliness something warmer than allegiance and profounder than loyalty. Today you are more than Sovereign: You are Head of the Family, and of a Nation and an Empire. You have made a Household.'

These are fine tributes, clothed in majestic yet simple language. And what perfect rhythm the speech has!

The fourth point I want you to remember is to punctuate your sentences properly. Don't run on and on without any full stops. Many women seem to be victims of this disease: it's a sort of verbal diarrhoea.

Here's a good example, taken from Scott Moncrieff's English translation of Marcel Proust : -

"When I succumbed to the attraction of a strange face (comma) when it was with the help of some other girl that I hoped to discoyer Gothic cathedrals (comma) the palaces and gardens of Italy (comma) I said to myself sadly that this love of ours (comma) in so far as it is love for one particular creature (comma) is not perhaps a very real thing (comma) since if the association of pleasant or unpleasant trains of thought can attach it for a time to a woman so as to make us believe that it has been inspired by her (comma) in a necessary sequence of effect to cause (comma) - Have you had enough yet? - yet when we detach ourselves (comma) deliberately or unconsciously (comma) from those associations (comma) this love (comma) - No, I really can't go on with this. It's ridiculous! Wouldn't it have been much simpler to split that sentence up into three or four separate sentences, instead of having all those relative clauses and parentheses?

Here's a short example of limpid, simple English by one of the most brilliant writers alive today - H. E. Bates. It's taken from his short story called 'Waiting Room'. I shall make a slight pause for a comma and a longer pause for a full-stop: -

''My brother and I were at the hospital early, before nine o'clock. The waiting room, a high one-windowed room painted a dark green, was empty. And for some time we sat on the bench and did nothing but stare at the opposite wall. It was the bitterest day of the winter, the bitterest day I could ever remember, the streets black rivers of ice, the sky full of the bitterness of snow which seemed as if it would never fall. ''

Now isn't that clear, tense, pregnant prose? It's just because it's properly punctuated.

The last point I want you to remember is to construct your sentences properly according to the ordinary rules of English grammar. Don't translate from the German or from Arabic or from Russian or from French. Write English, not Pinglish I

In order to see how far you've understood my talks on the difference between English and Pinglish, here's a Pinglish advertisement which I want you to write down as I dictate it. Then rewrite it in correct English and send it to me in an envelope with your name and address. The three listeners who send in the best versions will each get an autographed copy of the booklet to be published next week containing the last six broadcasts on Brighter English.

Now, are you ready? I'll speak very slowly and say each sentence twice.

'Respectable Sirs, Respectable Sirs, I except laundry by the weight and in pieces. I except laundry: by the weight arid in pieces. I am specialist having many experiment. I am specialist having many experiment. We remember you that for the quality we are guaranteed. We remember you that for the quality we are guaranteed. According to the crisis our price are from the lowest. According to the crisis our price are from the lowest. We are not obligated to losses or misses. We are not obligated to losses or misses. At this opportunity I beg to asking your kindly consideration to my factory. At this opportunity I beg to asking your kindly consideration to my factory. With high attention. With high attention'.

Now, rewrite that paragraph in proper English and send it to me in an envelope with your name and address. If you don't want to give your real name, just write 'Listener' : but you must give your address. Send your letter to the President of the Brighter English League, care of the Palestine Broadcasting Service, Jerusalem. The competition is open to everyone between the ages of nine and ninety.

I shall be interested to see the results of a competition of this kind over the wireless. I'm never quite sure whether listeners can follow clearly what I say. One listener came up to me the other day and told me how much English he'd learned from my talks. .But he must have been using a cheap wireless set which made lots of noises which he thought were part of the English language. He talked to me like this: -'Mr. President, (click, click ! ) see how well (whistle) I speak English'.

I only hope you won't make the same mistake.

Before I stop, let me recommend to you a delightful little book that's just been published by Sir Denison Ross, the former Principal of the School of Oriental Languages in London. It's called 'This English Language' and it's full of English idioms and famous English quotations. You'll find it's equally useful for foreign students and for English people. It's published by Longmans Green & Co. of London. You can order it through any bookseller in Palestine for 270 mils.

Good night.